Anxiety Advantages

When anxiety is in full swing it's hard to imagine any positives about the horrible sensations you feel. However, digging deep in your mind you will find that anxiety brings an opportunity to grow. 

When I was struggling terribly with my anxiety between 2010-2012, I would constantly fight with the tensions I had. I still working at it today but I'm making a gradual slope up. At the time, however I thought 'thinking' my fears away would be good use of my time, but in fact it made it all the worse.

Things began to change slightly in 2012. I wanted to get on top of my feelings so I made a motivational board, giving me a woosh of positivity and purpose. I made my motivation board a physical one which I could look at regularly which I still update it to match my current progress to help stay in-tune. I have also linked my Pinterest board for any inspiration:

http://www.pinterest.com/myhopestree/motivation-positivity/

I really took 'Inspire a generation' in my own stride with a relaxing hobby rather than a traditional sport - knitting. I had begun a simply ball of white wool which I knitted top to bottom without a particular pattern in mind. It was uneven and lumpy, representing a Father Christmas shaped beard, but I enjoyed it, calming my breathing down to a rate I hadn't felt in what seemed a lifetime.

2013, enough was enough. I referred myself for some therapy, and was given a self-help style programme with tailored-to-fit modules, which gave me structure to turn my life back around.

I came to learn about mindfulness, using the present to calm the mind and live life more to the full. I am learning to slow down and take breaks for myself and knowing that when I'm over-doing it my body is usually telling me that through my anxiety.

I have been able to develop a more easy-going mindset and be a bit more kind to myself which has decreased anxiety levels and allow me to take my time to relax whenever I do feel on edge.

2014, I have started yoga. It has been something I have wanted to do for a longtime and it's another positive thing to add to my journey of personal growth. It has been a great way to relax and unwind as well as strengthening core muscle groups, resulting in the ultimate feel good factor. 

My goal for the rest of the year is to do more things I want to do, the things that have been left out while my anxiety has got in the way: new hobbies, new styles, new career, making time for the hobbies I already enjoy... 

But today is Valentines Day and I'm happy. And that's not to with any cards or chocolates and romantic gestures because I haven't had any this year but I'm making the most of having the trains cancelled from the flooding, being a little bit ill and having some self-love day, staying in bed and rejuvenating. 

Oddly all this positivity has stemmed from a bit of anxiety. 

Zoë

(Look out for my Anxiety Story on the blog Tiny Buddha where I talk about Practice, Patience and Perseverance: Trust You're Making Progress. Coming soon in April.)

 

The Deep Introvert

Introverts are very deep and tend to be listeners. We tend to make good writers because we have great insight about the world.

I find that Extraverts can talk about anything and mostly to anyone. I have my own selection of whom I really talk to and I find that all that I say is full of depth and and quite fluffy with plenty of rhetorical questions resembling the process of my mind, a blog posts or a journal posts. It's like I'm not really talking to anyone at all.

I am a listener. I always have been, and there are many great things about listeners. They tend to be more understanding and patient people. I have a set of Extravert friends who I speak to mainly on a one-to-one basis. I feel like they are the more dominate ones because they hold the conversation and often come up the various topics to talk about. "Oh so-and-so will listen to me." I wish I had that confidence. It's degrading of personal value to say that I don't think people will listen to me. All I have is that deep, fluffy stuff I just mentioned and that can be too overwhelming for people, I can sense it. It just makes me feel I should be quiet and just listen to them instead.

I have to start believing that people do want to listen to what I have to say, more than just them just wanting a reply for me and happily getting it. I guess it's what makes me a decent friend to have around.

I guess I just feel a bit lost right now. Searching for external things to fill the gaps doesn't really work, and then you are forced to look into yourself. I never used to find it hard but I seem to now. Maybe talking about the deep fluffy stuff is my way of writing to myself using an audience as my value rather than myself. That should change, and I should see what a special Introvert I am.