The Deep Introvert

Introverts are very deep and tend to be listeners. We tend to make good writers because we have great insight about the world.

I find that Extraverts can talk about anything and mostly to anyone. I have my own selection of whom I really talk to and I find that all that I say is full of depth and and quite fluffy with plenty of rhetorical questions resembling the process of my mind, a blog posts or a journal posts. It's like I'm not really talking to anyone at all.

I am a listener. I always have been, and there are many great things about listeners. They tend to be more understanding and patient people. I have a set of Extravert friends who I speak to mainly on a one-to-one basis. I feel like they are the more dominate ones because they hold the conversation and often come up the various topics to talk about. "Oh so-and-so will listen to me." I wish I had that confidence. It's degrading of personal value to say that I don't think people will listen to me. All I have is that deep, fluffy stuff I just mentioned and that can be too overwhelming for people, I can sense it. It just makes me feel I should be quiet and just listen to them instead.

I have to start believing that people do want to listen to what I have to say, more than just them just wanting a reply for me and happily getting it. I guess it's what makes me a decent friend to have around.

I guess I just feel a bit lost right now. Searching for external things to fill the gaps doesn't really work, and then you are forced to look into yourself. I never used to find it hard but I seem to now. Maybe talking about the deep fluffy stuff is my way of writing to myself using an audience as my value rather than myself. That should change, and I should see what a special Introvert I am.